The Sound of Siren’s silence!

Siren Max
As grudge matches go, this one was the ultimate! Siren has been itching to get her hands on me after I pulled off a shock win against her last year.
And boy I did I make her wait as I dined out on my one point victory!!
The reality of a rather lucky and hard fought 5-4 win had been replaced by my rather embellished version of events that, had you read my tweets, suggested I’d completely destroyed her!
So the needle has been sharp. The trash talk has been constant. And the inevitability of a rematch has grown with each passing day.
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Finally, I arranged it. Sick of accusations that I was ducking the rematch and determined to prove my first win wasn’t a complete fluke, I made the trip to London and put my money where my mouth is.
And boy did I prove myself!!!
Firstly, I have to say Siren looks better than ever. In fact all the Max girls do. Beauties inside and out and continuing to get even better.
Siren has been working out and the results are evident in these photos. The exciting thing about people relatively new to the scene are that they’ll get better. I’m excited to see where she will be in the coming weeks and months and years!
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I, on the other hand, remain the beer drinking, cigarette smoking gym-phobic Mr Bean lookalike I’ve always been!
She was gunning for revenge. And I have to admit I was nervous. Not only did she look stronger but there was a steel and determination in her eyes that screamed “I’m gonna kick your skinny butt!”
I tried to soften her up with a little belated birthday treat of wine and chocolates. She appreciated the thought even if she still wanted to slap me down!
But I’d used the intervening 12 months wisely in terms of sessions. Matches with Inferno (obviously), Sativa, Raven and 2v2 marches with Jade and Inferno (obviously) had served me well, despite the heavy defeats I’d suffered! I wasn’t unprepared.
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So when Siren flew at me looking to overwhelm me with her spitfire attacks, I dug deep and resisted them. Fought out of scissors and didn’t let her take advantage when she was on top.
And then I struck! Siren was so busy trying to attack that she left herself open to my deadly body scissors! She screamed and winced and then tapped! BOOM!
Boy was she mad! She couldn’t believe it. And yet, this was just the start because minutes later I repeated the old trick and doubled my lead!!
Siren wore the look of a shell shocked girl who couldn’t believe what was happening.
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She came at me even harder. And fuck, her gym sessions certainly have paid off because her scissors and locks were vicious and far more painful than last year.
But I had my old friend perspiration on my side. She was getting hot and sweaty which meant I was able to slide out of her moves and get the escape route I’d never have gotten otherwise. There is a reason why I’ll never wrestle her in winter!!
I was soon in dreamland when I got her in a nasty headlock that she had to tap out from!! She was livid and looking worried now. Not because she thought she was fighting a wrestling god but more that if she didn’t turn this around, the Twitter grief she’d get from me would be twice as unbearable as it has ever been!!
Siren was having to go all out attack now and I was able to pick her off. My next body scissor was more a case of her being trapped than hurt so she reluctantly tapped.
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I started thinking I was going to get a whitewash…until she showed exactly what she was about. Her speed and skill dazzled me and she got me in a vicious choke and body scissor combination – easily the best move of the match from either of us.
Of course, she had to keep going for it and I kept frustrating her. If I’m honest, I didn’t have her in big trouble much, just got her trapped which meant she had to use energy just trying to get me off her.
And of course, that played into my hands and I took full advantage. A couple more body scissors did the trick and Siren was beaten and broken! Well, annoyed more than broken but I guess I’ve already started the whole exaggeration thing to mock her mercilessly!
At the end of the hour, she was determined to carry on and beat my ass! I saved her from an even bigger massacre by ending it there. A 6-1 win would suffice for me!
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I’d won emphatically! Siren was devastated – although I suspect that was mainly because she knew what was in store on Twitter!
All the doubters. All those who said I’d lose. And most of all, Siren herself who promised to kick my butt. All humbled! Never underestimate a Mr Bean lookalike!!
Siren has the dubious honours of being on the end of my biggest ever victory and being the first wrestler I’ve beaten twice. But that doesn’t tell her story.
Her story is that she is magnificent. A drop dead gorgeous girl, a delight on the mats and incredible fun. Last year she had a sixth sense about what sort of session I’d want and she’d delivered big time. She easily matched those high standards this year.
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In fact, I’d argue she surpassed them. Forget the score, the girl is stronger and she has more in her locker. I’m beginning to wonder if I’m just her “bogeyman” as she has beaten better and stronger session wrestling guys than me.
And if there was any doubts about how she has improved then the glorious aches and pains I’m suffering post match this time – far more than last time – dispel them. My stubbornness and desire not to submit alongside the luck of being able to slip out of danger helped me.
But the bottom line is I can’t recomment this girl enough. Not only does she deliver big time on the mats, she is a truly sweet and lovely woman. I felt sad saying goodbye after the session.
Siren is a credit to the Max girls and she has served to increase my desire to wrestle the others as soon as money and opportunities will allow me. We truly are lucky to have them in our scene.
All that said though, she knows what is going to happen now. Twitter can be an unforgiving place when you have a smug little shit of a wrestler celebrating a fantastic win…
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Scorching start to my session wrestling year

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A new year brings about hope, optimism, the chance of a fresh start and an opportunity to achieve things you’ve never been able to do before.

Well, that’s the theory anyway. Sadly for me, the applying that in practice is far more difficult and it was the same old story yet again when I kick started my session wrestling year against my favourite, my nemesis – the very beautiful and brilliant Inferno.

It won’t surprise you to hear that I was keen to start 2019 with an hour wrestling this flame-haired wonder before I’d even consider any other opponents. January brought about much upheaval (all positive) in my personal life so I had to wait a month before it all began.

So as soon as my life got back to some kind of normality we sorted out a date, it was time to head to Woking and Dodgy Dave’s immense place in particular (cheers for the lift from the station to Dave!).

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I came to the conclusion long ago that Inferno could wear absolutely anything in these sessions and she’d still look gorgeous. So when she got changed and walked into the room wearing this delightful one piece, my jaw dropped to the floor and my phone couldn’t come out quick enough to take the photos!

But, despite me snapping away enthusiastically, we weren’t here for a fashion show. This was a wrestling match. A war. My latest opportunity to put Inferno in her place. I was feeling fit and raring to go. All ready for making her finally tap out to me in this, our 21st wrestling session.

I lost 8-0!

And that scoreline flattered me beyond belief. Don’t be fooled by the relatively low score – she dominated and destroyed me as she usually does!

She was quick, inventive, utilised her immense skills and incredible flexibility to inflict some serious pain – all the traits that made me love her instantly in my very first session with her in June 2013!

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She’s getting stronger too and the best thing about it all? I don’t think she’s anywhere near her best yet. The recovery from the horrific broken leg has gone well and she has wrestled in sessions and shows and produced the goods to a high level as she always does. But there is so much more to come and it’s exciting and also a bit scary to think that!

The first submission she got came as a result of her turning the tables when I was actually attacking! As I tried to lock on my trusty (IE only real move) body scissors, she managed to trap my ankle between her legs and apply pressure that made me tap out

I continued to be predictable while she continued to be wonderful. There were arm bars, breast smothers, head and body scissors, head locks, pins…she was enjoying herself while I was trying to hang on for survival!

There was one moment when I went on the attack and troubled her. A body scissor (well, what else?!) was locked on good and proper. Now this could have been THE moment where the holy grail could have been reached. Finally make the stubborn cow tap…

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Only she let out a loud scream that was somewhere between a martial arts war cry and a genuine expression of pain. “HAI!”. I’d never heard her make such a bizarre noise and I laughed so hard that I couldn’t keep my scissor grip locked on and let her off the hook!

And then I continued to laugh. She started laughing too. In fact, there was a fair amount of laughter throughout because we are both funny onions. And we were enjoying ourselves immensely.

It’s probably what helped me keep the score to only 4-0 for a large chunk of the hour. That and the cheating. Neither of us are averse to the dark arts, it’s fair to say, when we battle. I pulled her hair. tried to give her stubble rash, pinched her and shoved her face into “Epping Forest” (my chest hair).

For Inferno’s part – she pulled my chest hair, tickled me, pinched me and slapped me hard across the face. Actually, so impressive was the slap even I had to fist pump her in recognition of her skills.

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I made the stupid mistake of taunting her over the low score which only served to inspire her efforts to raise. Triangles, more scissors, an arm lock or two…she made me suffer big time and doubled her score to 8-0 before the time, sadly, ran out and the session was over.

They always go quickly because they are so much fun. And because I’m usually mesmerised by Inferno’s outrageous skills twisting me up and inflicting all sorts of incredible wrestling pain on me!

I know I always praise her to the hills but she truly does deserve every word. There was a recent Twitter debate about the cost of sessions and the fact that most girls haven’t raised their prices in years.

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Well, Inferno provides above and beyond value for money in her sessions and she is worth a damn sight more than the fee she charges. Her professionalism, dedication, talent and head turning beauty makes her my forever favourite.

I can’t recommend her highly enough. Especially if you haven’t ever sessioned with her before. In fact, I’m actually impressed if you are a session wrestler and you’ve somehow managed to resist because it seems to impossible for me!

Afterwards, we had a lovely dinner and drink and caught up about life and wrestling and other animals. I’m already itching for another session with her!

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2018: A Wrestling Odyssey


Now, this past year was more like it! I’ve had a couple of relatively quiet years on the old session wrestling scene due to a variety of reasons.

But 2018 didn’t turn out too badly at all! For a start, I did a couple more sessions than I’d thought I’d manage and I even tasted victory again for the first time in years (no, really!)!

Naturally, Ari/Inferno featured a lot but I make no apologies for that – she remains my beautiful favourite who continues to inspire and leave me awe-struck.

It was also exciting to take part in a couple of two v two matches, tackle three new opponents (well, three girls I’d never wrestled before so new to me) and take in Monica’s magnificent April live show.

Of course, there is plenty of negativity. Predictably, it’s some of the idiot guys on the scene who have to drag things down. But it’s easy to let the negatives consume you and they suddenly take up more air time than the positives, so I won’t dwell on them any further.

Besides, I’m probably a negative in the eyes of other guys so I’m hardly in a position to throw stones from my glass house!

Anyway, the joy of the scene comes from the fun we have with the girls. And once again, they proved to be incredible. So here is my look back on the past 12 months.

Inferno/Araneae/Domina Araneae


Where do I even begin with this one? Well, perhaps at the beginning of the year – when I had my first session of 2018 against the ravishing redhead! I list her three professional names here because she delighted in all three guises!

I was always going to kick off my year by wrestling Inferno as she continued to get stronger and stronger following her broken leg nine months earlier.

Obviously, I wasn’t expecting to win or even trouble the scores – something I have never done and long come to the conclusion I’ll never achieve – as I had already failed to do so a couple of months earlier when her leg was even more delicate.

Despite her injury, she was fabulous as usual. All the skills and fun that made her my instant favourite in 2013 were on display and the hour flew by in the blink of an eye.

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We had another wrestling session in October and it was equally delightful. In fact, it was even better as she was much stronger! What a woman.

As for Domina Ari – well, I had enjoyed my needleplay session with her back in 2016 so much, it was time for a second stabbing! I drove down to her fantastic dungeon and let her loose on me.

Mistress waxed my chest hair (ouch!) and then proceeded to decorate my freshly shaved torso with more than 30 needles. The feeling, the rush, the exhilaration – amazing. Mistress took care of me too, of course. Her professionalism matches her talents!

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As for Araneae, well, her modelling photos have continued to delight me all year around – especially her work with the awesome photographer Mark Page. But the highlight, as always, is the calendar they produce.

Stunning images and this year, she’s donating the proceeds to a great cause in Pineapple Support. What a girl. If you haven’t got yours, you can get it here:

Away from business, we often chat, have a laugh and offer advice when needed. I couldn’t ask for a better friend.

Siren, Raven & Sativa – my new wrestling experiences

There are so many girls out there who I’d love to wrestle. Reasons, usually of the financial variety, have prevented me from sessioning everyone I’d like to wrestle.

But at least this year, I ticked several off the wish list and they were all incredible!


Firstly, Siren – well, Baby Max as she was known back then! One of the marvellous Max girls and a gorgeous little sexy spitfire of a girl. We had a phenomenal hotel room battle which went back and forth.

And I won!!!!!! I still can’t believe it either but I did! Naturally, I’ve not let her forget about it ever since and she is demanding a rematch. She even changed her name to Siren shortly after – such is her shame! I think a new rivalry is born and I might have to give her a shot at redemption sooner rather than later.

Seriously though, I can’t recommend this beautiful delight highly enough. She is fabulous and an absolute sweetheart.


Raven had been on my radar for a couple of years but the opportunity never arose – until she came to Rowley Gym in my manor and we finally clashed on the mats.

And she was everything you’d hope a session wrestler would be! Obviously beautiful and strong but she was lovely and heaps of fun with it too, making sure she delivered a cracking session that we could both enjoy (at least I hope she enjoyed it too!). She easily won of course, even though I did make her submit a couple of times (I suspect she was going easy on me)!

I knew I’d love it and, to be honest, I can’t imagine anyone ever not liking this amazing girl. There will be more sessions with Raven for sure!


And it was at my session with Raven where I first met the sensational Sativa and arranged my first ever session with her. Boy did she live up to the reputation!

Skilled, strong, speedy and such a delightful woman to session with. She kicked my butt of course but I already knew that was going to happen. The main thing was the fun and laughs we had and the fact she blew me away with her talent.

I couldn’t believe she had been in the scene for two years before I’d finally had a session with her but I certainly won’t wait as long for a second helping of exquisite Sativa!

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Probably the best messages I received all year came from the incredible top chap that is Roleplay Fan, who invited me to team up with him to take on besties and beautiful badass babes Inferno (but of course!) and Jade! Not once but twice.

We actually thought we might upset the odds in the first clash which involved bondage wrestling! How did that work out RP?! The second time was a straight out wrestling match.

We got our asses kicked big time of course. They are not only talented individually, they know how to work together to devastating effect! Not that we were complaining, they are hotter than the sun and it was a bloody exciting way to be broken!


Better still, we had such a laugh in both sessions. Four people having a blast doing what we love gave me two of my best hours of the year. I can’t thank Inferno, Jade and mostly RP for making that happen.

Jade will be retiring from the scene in 2019 which is a damn shame. But the great news is her personal life is on the up and that’s the most important thing. I must get at least one session in with her before she goes!

Monica’s marvellous magical event

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Quite simply, Monica is one of the best people in this scene. Takes no shit but is fantastic fun and puts on some incredible shows. I only got to one this year but, my god, it was worth it!

Check this line-up out: Inferno, Jade, Kassidy, Scorpion, Galya, Combat Swallow, Juicy and Ace! A bit of everything to suit all tastes – all brilliant and beautiful to watch!

Not only were the matches top notch but the vibe was awesome and there was even a bit of needle and controversy in one of the matches! What more could an excitable 40-something female wrestling fan want?!

I could wax lyrical about each individual match but you’re best of visiting Monica’s website and downloading them – they are worth it. Get them here:

MWC April event

So there we have it. My brilliant year in wrestling. It could have been even better if planned sessions with Viper (I’ll get you soon Skippy!) Max and Lisa King weren’t unfortunately cancelled. But these things happen and I’m sure I’ll meet them soon enough.

It was a bloody good year. And that included some great interaction with other guys too. Not least Antimatterlad – who remains a top bloke, Gary my fellow Brummie – great to catch up over dinner with Raven and Sativa, the returning Gary the Manc – good to see you sunshiiiiine and finally meeting Bert Wrestler – man, that boy is gorgeous!

With big positive changes taking place in my vanilla life, I really want 2019 to be an equally exciting a fruitful one in my wrestling world. Thanks for being awesome people – happy new year to us all!

Enjoying Ari all year round and supporting a great cause

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2013 was a pretty damn good year as it was when I started my session wrestling journey – a road I’m still travelling on today.

And June 15 was my favourite day of that year as that is the date of my first session with a certain beautiful, redhead wrestler who, you may have noticed, has become a bit of a favourite of mine… 😉

But along with the many things I discovered about Ari/Inferno in those early weeks and months was that she produced a calendar for her fans! When it was time to pre-order her 2014 one, I was inputting my credit card details before you could say ‘Happy New Year’.

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I was delighted when it arrived. The photos were incredible – showing off her glorious beauty in breathtaking images which also gave an insight into her character and all the different strands of her career and interests.

There was never a chance of me going back to calendars of anyone or anything else. Why would I want a calendar of musicians or sports teams that, despite having respect and admiration for, I had no genuine connection with?

I felt a surge of pride that I knew the exquisite girl on Ari’s calendar! Of course, 2015, 2016, 2017 and last year’s followed. She managed to do the seemingly impossible and improved on each one year on year.

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They are worth buying and keeping as collectables too. You’ll never tire of looking at the pictures!

During the last few years, the incredible fetish photographer Mark Page (check him out at @pwa2009 on Twitter) has been the guy taking the shots.

They have worked together for a while and the chemistry between them is amazing and I’ve always said that Mark and his “muse” create magic together. The photographs that emerge from their sessions stop you dead in your tracks and the certainly make the calendar essential.

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The 2018 calendar had no right to be as wonderful as it is – given that she had broken her leg in 2017 and was still recovering when shoot time came around. But wonderful it still was and a testament to how fabulous Ari and Mark are.

Naturally, buying an Ari calendar is an essential part of the festive season for me. Not only does it help me know what day of the year it is (pretty vital for a calendar, right?!), it also means I get to have regular dates with a beautiful woman which, I probably don’t need to tell you, is extremely rare!

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This year, there is even more reason to buy one of them. Ari, the kind-hearted selfless beauty that she is, has decided to donated the proceeds to a cause close to her heart – Pineapple Support (You can learn more about it here:

Pineapple Support provides mental health care and advice to performers across the world and Ari has already given a lot to help this fabulous support network and this gesture is so typical of her.

I won’t lie – my main reason for buying one is and will always be the photos of this absolute stunner of a girl. But knowing that buying a calendar featuring a beautiful girl will support an amazing cause makes it even better!

As we’ve all no doubt discovered, we never know how a year is going to turn out and what life will throw at us during any 12 month period. But we can at least make sure 2019 starts off in fantastic and rather beautiful fashion with an Ari calendar to adorn our walls!

You can pre-order yours now by visiting the page on her website here:

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Sensational Sativa delights on the mats


Wow! I was expecting Sativa to be brilliant as I’d heard so many positive reviews from girls who worked with her and guys who’d been lucky enough to session with her.

But it turns out they were all wrong – she’s way better than anything I’d been told! Lightning fast, super strong, incredibly skilful and an absolute beautiful sweetheart to go with it!

Out of many of the delightful newbies who’ve come along in the past two years, Sativa has been high on my wish list and it was a sheer delight to be able to tick the box at TC Wrestling’s Rowley gym.

I’d actually met her for the first time a week before, when I had a session with Raven, and I didn’t hesitate to book her once she told me she’d be back on my turf, so to speak!


As you can see from the photos, she was looking fabulous for our session. Gorgeous face, cracking body and those ultra cool hair braids (She probably thinks I’m the weird ‘hair fetish’ guy given the amount of times I comment on her styles!).

She’d had a full day filming with the awesome Bert Wrestler but there was no sign of that at all and she was clearly full of energy and in the mood to destroy me!

And boy did she hit me with her hurricane right from the beginning! She produced quite possibly the maddest minute I’ve ever experienced in mixed wrestling! After pouncing on me, she got me in at least four different moves in ultra quick succession.

I’d have tapped every single time if she’d have kept me in the hold but instead she released after a few seconds and gave me a running commentary on the different ways she could make me tap if she really wanted to!


I was in a daze and I knew this one was going to be trouble!

Things calmed down (relatively speaking) but the traffic was still flowing in one direction. Sativa would attack, I’d desperately cower and try to defend and then she’d laugh.

Her body scissors, head scissors and triangles were immense, her arm bars, head locks, guillotines and smothers were perfectly executed and her chat was devastating.

There were only a few submissions as she chose to hold back a little and taunt me instead. I knew damn well that she could take me at will but I enjoyed the psychological boost of the score being quite low – even if she dominated me completely!


I impressed her once or twice (I think) by holding on for dear life and even escaping some of her moves. But I was under no illusion that she had several gears she could go up if she wanted.

The most impressive move out of Sativa’s outstanding performance was when she made me tap out in sheer pain after executing a camel clutch. Apparently, she never used to be able to do that so well – I can confirm she bloody well can now!

Her other submissions came through me being crushed by her powerful arms and legs, smothered by her fantastic breasts or fearing that my arms would be broken when she caught me in bars and locks!

Sativa was so quick and flexible which, combined with her strength, meant she could do whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted! And it seemed as if she knew what I was going to try to do before even I did!


I did manage to mount my own attacks a couple of times. It won’t surprise you to hear that my legs got her in body and head scissors and I like to think she had to work a bit to get out of them!

However, her expression never changed no matter how hard I squeezed! There was no contortion, no groans of pain, just a “Ooh well done. This is giving me a decent workout” and the same smile on her face that she had when I arrived!

I told her this was disconcerting and her expression finally changed to one of great satisfaction!

As the match wore on, I engaged her in more chat to help keep her at bay for longer. I also backed off many times out of fear and self preservation! But whatever I did, there was ultimately no escape from Sativa!


The session just flew by – such was the fun and immense action we were enjoying – and when Bert came in to signal the end, we were both genuinely surprised!

She struck a victory pose to highlight the dominance she had enjoyed over me and it’s hard to argue that it wasn’t well deserved!

Sativa is magnificent. Breathtakingly talented and an absolute stunner. I could see exactly why she’s made such a massive impact in just over two years in the scene! I’m already looking forward to another session with the sensational one!

Flying high after my session with Raven


I’ve been keen to meet ravishing Raven on the wrestling mats for years so when I saw she was heading to Birmingham, I wasn’t going to miss out!

I’d seen her at Pippa L’Vinn’s wrestling shows in Manchester, watched her do her thing on video clips, heard so many great things about her from guys who had sessioned with her and even met her once and enjoyed one of her amazing cups of tea!

So this really was long overdue. Raven is gorgeous. As you can see from the photos, she has this beaming, welcoming smile, the sweetest nature and is a truly fabulous girl to chat to.

She’s also a wrestling machine and packs some incredible power, knowing exactly how and when to use it, so I wasn’t exactly banking on victory!

I got to TC Wrestling’s Rowley gym and was greeted by the main woman herself. I had that glorious feeling of nervousness and excitement as I got ready and knew I was going to love this.


And love it I did! Raven proved to be better than all the reviews and certainly exceeded my expectations. And just look at these photos! Isn’t she looking magnificent?!

There was a bit of time testing each other out with some good natured trash talk to warm us up. Her strength and skill advantage was obvious before we’d started but I got a taste of the gulf in class as she started to execute a few moves that I just managed to escape from.

Raven was toying with me, knowing she could make me submit at will. I experienced her body crushing scissors, head locks, arm bars and then the devastating ankle lock that made me tap out for the first time!

But then, I completely shocked myself and probably Raven by actually levelling the scores up!! During the course of our wrestling, she fell into my scissors and I squeezed a submission out of her against the odds and certainly against the run of play!

I was shocked and delighted! Of course, it didn’t last long because Raven’s own scissors helped her restore her lead and increase that advantage further. But then I did it again! I got her in another body scissor and she gave! Suddenly I felt like a decent wrestler, giving this brilliant talent a run for her money!!


However, a reality check was needed. Firstly, I knew Raven wasn’t going all out and as soon as she cranked up the pressure things changed.

She again started going through her arsenal and putting me in all sorts of bother while giving a running commentary to increase my sense of fear at what was to come.

Like all the great wrestlers, Raven is not adverse to a spot of ‘bending the rules’, shall we say! When I did launch an attack she was certainly quick to tickle me, bend my ears or nipples, or poke me!

Not that she needed to, though. Her class was shining through as she increased her lead. She would have got far more if she didn’t tease and toy around with me!

There was plenty of screaming and groaning in pain from me as she went through her repertoire. She also rag-dolled me around a bit and made it abundantly clear who the dominant one was!


I did have one final shock though. She had me in a headlock and I used a surprisingly decent amount of flexibility to bring my legs up and trap her in a head scissor! She tried to resist but I got her good and she had to tap out!

Damn! I got something other than a body scissor! Perhaps one day I’ll make a wrestler after all?!?!?!

Seriously, I was under no illusions though, the scoreline flattered me somewhat and I got my butt well and truly kicked. But as ever, the main thing was having a great time and Raven delivered big time.

She is a damn fine wrestler, gorgeous, a warm and funny girl who knows who to deliver a session exactly how her client wants.

The whole evening turned out to be brilliant as I also finally met super Sativa for the first time and got to see the awesome Gary, who had come for his own session with Raven. We all went out for a bite to eat after and chewed the fat about all that’s great and bad in the scene.

One thing’s for sure, Raven falls in the ‘great about the scene’ category! She’s an absolute star and I can’t recommend her highly enough!


Inferno’s way too hot to handle – AGAIN!

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My wrestling weekend wonder was originally set to see me take on the gorgeous and talented Aussie Max Girl Viper.

But when she – and potential substitute Siren – chickened out (don’t listen to their ‘excuses’, that’s the story I’m putting out there!) I was left trying to quench my grappling thirst.

So, who better to turn to as I looked to satisfy my wrestling desires than the very best?! Yes, my dear favourite – the amazing Inferno!

I know I’d only faced her 24 hours earlier in a 2v2 tag match with Jade and Roleplay Fan but, as I’ve always said, no matter how many times I session her I always look forward to the next one. She really is that damn good!

Thankfully she had some time free between other sessions and commitments and so I made the short trip out to Woking and, in particular, Dodgy Dave’s marvellous place for our one on one grudge fight.


This was the 20th time I’d had a wrestling session with Inferno (including those doubles where she teamed up with Jade) in five years and in that time I have never made her tap and she has earned more than 150 submissions. Some might suggest it’s a slightly one-sided rivalry…

However, this time was surely going to be the time where her luck finally ran out and I managed to walk away with at least one point to my name?

No, of course it bloody wasn’t! I might adore this woman but, my god, she’s a stubborn and uncharitable cow at times! And those times are usually during our sessions!!

As you can see, she was looking her usual beautiful magnificent self. And even better than that she was also her usual skilful magnificent self on the mats despite her excursions over the weekend and the fact her leg is technically still in recovery mode!

Right from the start, it was clear she was not going to show any mercy or hold back as she went to work.

It’s not as if I was surprised to find Inferno quicker than me, more flexible and more skilled. Obviously, all that’s a given. And she did it with a big smile on her face as I squirmed, moaned, groaned and yelped in pain.

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My only success really came in keeping the scoreline respectably low for a large chunk as I would hold on for dear life or engage her in conversation to distract her from attacking.

But the submissions kept coming however. She got them through head locks, body scissors, arm bars, head scissors…basically, whichever way took her fancy at any given moment.

And then there was her usual flexibility which continue to defy the laws of science and stop me from ever getting a submission out of her!

I wasn’t completely impotent in terms of going on the attack. I made her yell a little once with my body scissor and once with a bear hug. I also managed to get on top and sit on her for a while, even trying to wind her by dropping my butt on her stomach. But mostly, she either laughed or looked bemused at my offensive attempts.

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As usual, there was dirty tricks. On both sides but I’ll argue she started it this time when she was tickling, pinching, slapping and pulling what little chest hair I have while she was on top. What was I supposed to do? Not retaliate?!

Reality was, however, that she didn’t need to cheat. She was doing a damn good job kicking my skinny butt through her wrestling moves!

I tried to lie about how many submissions she had actually attained as the session was nearing the end but she saw through it. And to make sure, she got a couple of quick fire submissions to bump up her scores! The final score was actually 10-0 and not the 8-0 I quoted her! Those times I just held on to her, sat on her or engaged her in chat for lengthy periods sure helped keep the score down!

But, as always, the score isn’t the main thing here (which is just as well for me, really!). The main thing is having a great time and Inferno always succeeds in providing the session I want and to the highest quality.

I make no bones about the fact that she is my favourite. And the fact I keep returning for sessions with her as much as I do (not just wrestling but beatdown, needleplay and domme ones too) speaks volumes about how brilliant she is.

Let’s face it, I’m never going to get a submission out of her. She’s way too determined and, more crucially, talented for me. But I’ll never stop having fun trying and failing!

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