Sometimes, life is golden. Even when things are tough, something happens that doesn’t just lift the gloom but helps you hit the heights of pure joy.
And for me that moment came when I booked my favourites Inferno and Jade for a double session. I don’t really need to say anymore about how perfect and exciting this session was going to be other than naming them!
Through my constant adulation via social media and this blog, the impact of my praise of both these perfect beauties may have dulled for some reading it. Indeed, I’ve probably run out of superlatives.
But as I say time and time again, they earn every positive syllable. Even after all these years and sessions, booking them is still a thrilling thing. I still look forward to seeing them as I did the very first time. Still get that buzz I did first time around. And I still get my arse kicked as I did the first time around!
So to finally book them both together – well that added a fresh dynamic that, while it wasn’t needed, certainly ramped up the anticipation level!
Alas, my weekend with Inferno and Jade didn’t actually get off to a great start. Train delays for people booked in earlier to Monica’s glorious wrestling centre meant all sessions were running late.
I was the last of the day. So I had to wait a while. But any minor irritation subsided once I arrived, knocked on the door and was greeted by the hyper beauty that is Jade! She and Inferno were finishing off destroying a prior client and I went to the waiting area.
When they were finally ready for me, I got changed and was confronted by the beauties you see in these photos! Inferno and Jade are not just besties but also have a perfect working partnership. Different in looks and character in many ways but the same in terms of talent, attractiveness and their desire to deliver top class sessions.
They have an understanding that is natural and they work like a dream. Even when posing for pictures! And that makes for an explosive and perfect session!
But before my camera came out, Jade started things off by setting up a mock mugging scenario! She chased me around the gym and then got me down. When she gently removed my glasses, I relaxed a bit as I thought she would only be playful. But that didn’t last long as she started trying to “steal” my wallet out my pocket.
I clung on for dear life but Inferno was soon backing her mate up and my wallet was seized. They ignored the money and went through my cards! The library card prompted them to label me a “geek”!!
Eventually they let me go and we moved to the ring for the battle proper. After a brief pause to take photos and videos, the “action” started. Inexplicably, I tried to attack both of them with slaps.
It was the last time I was to be “ahead”. The punishment started and there was no let up from start to finish.
It effectively became a beatdown session with me trying and spectacularly failing to try to fight back.
I actually lost count of the submissions! Which is unheard of for me – but it was relentless! Headlocks, body scissors, arm bars, face sits, arm locks – and much more gave me no chance.
They’d do this individually or as a team. Each time with devastating effect.
I’m a big fan of both their arses but getting one of them in my face as I was trying to battle out of the other’s scissor made life difficult!
Unsurprisingly, I was in immense pain in no time. As nothing was off limit, I pulled their hair, bit them, tickled them, shoved their faces into “Epping forest”…and this unleashed the beast in them!
Inferno bit my arm in retaliation, Jade literally kicked me in the arse. They both started kicking and punching like professional UFC fighters. I replied with bitch slaps and weak as fuck kicks back!
One would hold, the other would attack. Then they’d swap. I had no response. It was amazing!!
Jade shocked me with the power of her kicks. I expected Inferno to pack a whole load of power as she is martial arts trained. But she’s also advised Jade on how to kick with more impact. And boy has Jade heeded that advice!
The taunts came thick and fast too. My whining and cries of pain seemed to feed their desire to attack. The wrestling/beatdown was relentless and I couldn’t do a single thing about it!
My sulking, pained face did little to help me. Like with everything else, it just encouraged them to be more brutal.
They pulled my chest hair, slapped me, attacked my crotch, gave me wedgies and punched and kicked me into next week. They also applied “fish hooks” to my mouth and shoved their stinky feet in my face. It was awesome!
So what was the final score? If it was less than 30 then I’m claiming victory! But I’d take a respectable defeat of 40-0 if offered! I really don’t know how many times I tapped. I just know I tapped a lot!
I was battered. Completely annihilated and boy it felt great. There was a contrast of emotions – the joy and thrill of a great session was tempered with the sadness that it had ended!
But I booked them with full confidence of getting a wonderful session and they totally smashed it.
I make no secret that they are my favourites. That’s not to say others aren’t great. Indeed, I know they are and have wrestled many of them. And I will wrestle more as time goes on.
But I connected instantly with Inferno when I first met her and the seeds of my love of her talent were planted instantly. It was similar with Jade. She blew my mind when I first wrestled her! I’m proud to call them my friends too.
So it won’t come as a shock to anyone that I’d recommend them for a double session. They are spectacular as solo wrestlers, they are double the trouble and double the brilliance as a duo!
I had a truly wonderful weekend. First the session, then hanging around with them after, talking about life, enjoying a meal and drinks. Of course, there will be other sessions with them. But I won’t deny that it was a wrench to leave when the time came and my heart hurts because I’m not still having a laugh with them right now!
I really can’t give them a better reference than that…